How dental hygiene and procedures compare to understanding the stages of conflict and types of processes used to deal with conflict.
What is your conflict hygiene like? Just like dental hygiene, addressing conflict early can prevent more serious issues down the line.
Coaching is like preventative hygiene. Just as brushing, flossing, and bi-annual check-ups keep your teeth healthy, coaching helps you maintain healthy relationships and prevent conflicts from escalating. They can also prevent conflicts (especially repeating conflicts) from occurring in the first place.
Coaching is a way to reach your goals so that you can prevent conflict in a systemic way, or coaching can improve communication to resolve conflicts at the lowest level. Typically, conflicts are not yet existent or at such a low level in coaching that people in conflict are still on the same side or can still work together as a team as needed in coaching. Resolving conflict at the lowest level before the damage becomes almost impossible to repair. Once trust is shattered, it is hard to regain. The typical by-product of team or organizational coaching can also improve teamwork, morale, and the strength of relationships.
The money businesses spend on coaching can show direct returns on company growth, or they can directly reinvest the money they save into their business. For individuals, the money they save through coaching can instead be spent on their happiness or personal growth instead of on stopping a conflict. In other words, coaching can also improve company growth or morale, or the money saved by preventing conflicts or addressing them early can be used elsewhere to grow the company, such as by buying new equipment. However, when conflict becomes too destructive, they throw money into stopping the destruction (like pulling a rotten tooth), not necessarily used for the growth of a business or personal development. Most people would probably prefer spending money on a relaxing vacation or career- or business-enhancing activity than on getting their teeth pulled if they had the option.
Mediation is akin to filling a cavity. It is a limited intervention after damage has occurred, addressing the issue before it becomes more severe. Mediation can occur before or after a lawsuit, although unfortunately many people wait until a lawsuit is filed. When mediation occurs after a party files a lawsuit, it typically is a limited intervention of settlement for money but does not necessarily prevent the same situation from happening again as coaching could address. Similar to how filling a cavity does not prevent another cavity from occurring or completely repair a tooth like no cavity had been there in the first place, mediation helps prevent a conflict from escalating even further at a cheaper cost compared to other alternatives with win-win solutions. When mediation occurs before a lawsuit at a lower level, there is a greater chance of addressing underlying issues because disputing parties might still be technically considered to be on the same team within an organization, but once a lawsuit occurs, they are almost considered adversaries often with attorneys involved. Oftentimes, at this stage, the lens narrows to settling the lawsuit, which can make it harder for parties to connect at a personal level or make big-picture decisions about what is best for the disputing parties as a whole (not just their legal rights and position). One of the benefits of mediation for parties is that mediation is a confidential process so the whole world does not need to listen in on parties' conflict.
Arbitration is like a root canal. It is moderately costly, painful, and intrusive, but sometimes necessary to resolve deeper issues. Unlike mediation, arbitration will almost certainly be a win-lose situation because arbitrators will decide who wins or loses the case instead of the disputants deciding what they both can agree to as an outcome. Arbitration typically takes the middle road in terms of length compared to mediation and lawsuits. The same conflict that could take 2-3 hours to resolve in mediation could take months or weeks to resolve in arbitration.
While arbitration is most certainly cheaper and faster than lawsuits, they also are not subject to precedent, so companies may never address the underlying problem that caused the litany of other similar complaints before. Arbitrations will be more expensive than mediations because arbitrators will typically have to review lots of case documents, read party filings, do independent research, and draft findings, which mediators typically do not or would not do. Parties may also hire their own attorneys to draft pleadings and argue before an arbitrator, so they will be paying both the costs for an arbitrator and at least one attorney in arbitration.
There are also greater consequences to hiring an arbitrator than a mediator. Parties do not need to settle if they disagree when they hire a mediator, but an arbitrator will make a binding decision even if one party disagrees, often without the ability to appeal. Especially since many large arbitration companies do not vet arbitrators for bias, this can be problematic for the losing party where the arbitrator shows bias or prejudice against one of the parties. The money spent on arbitration is not used to grow or reinvest in businesses or one's life.
Lawsuits are comparable to full mouth reconstruction. They are costly, visible, time-intensive, painful, and intrusive, often being the last resort when other methods have failed. Where arbitration could take months, lawsuits could take years. This is especially the case where there is a requirement to exhaust administrative remedies. In that case, plaintiffs might first need to spend years trying to win in the administrative complaints process before they try again in court if they disagree with the outcome of the administrative process. Lawsuits are almost always public for everyone to see and research. Paying for a team of attorneys, plus litigation costs and expert witness fees (as well as potentially the attorneys' fees of the opposing party) for several years is certainly more expensive than paying for a mediator for a couple of hours. The money spent on litigation is not used to grow or reinvest in businesses or one's life. Rather, litigation can often worsen company culture or relationships given strategies and behaviors in the adversarial process that lead people to turn on each other or avoid liability or the destruction of trust. Victories can be pyrrhic where winning is still losing.
Restorative justice is like getting dentures or an implant to replace a pulled tooth. It focuses on repairing harm and restoring relationships, even after significant damage has been done. The tooth has already been pulled, so things may never be the same again but the process toward reconciliation and the restoration of the victim can begin. Restorative justice only typically works where the perpetrator of harm admits to harm.
Restorative justice has been used in situations, such as whole-country conflicts or in juvenile justice. However, restorative justice can be used in a variety of other situations as well, such as for discrimination cases. In whole-country conflicts (such as with a civil war), many parties could have done harm but the country as a whole wants to move on or too many parties would be thrown in jail for society that it would be administratively impossible or impractical to do. Perpetrators might have committed atrocities, but the trade is amnesty for admission of harm and a promise not to harm again or to step down from power instead of continuing to commit future atrocities. Alternatively, for cases, such as juvenile offenders, kids might have their first offense and not realize the harm they have done with their actions like with a fight or egging someone's house. There, the offender compensates the victim for the damage, and the offender starts to see the negative impact of their actions. Parties may never become friends. However, trust can be restored, or healing can take place, healing those other processes, such as a lawsuit or arbitration, do not typically provide.
So, how long do you want to wait to address conflict? Just like with your teeth, the sooner you act, the better the outcome.
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